What Was I Thinking…

The last couple of days I’ve been trying to decide what I would post about next.  I have a couple of projects that I’ve completed and a couple more in the process but as Holy week is approaching I really wanted to write a little more of a faith related post. I’ve had several thoughts during my recent days and have, at the time, been able to expand that thinking into more, until I sit down at my computer to write…then they are all gone! I don’t understand how something that I can think about for a good deal of time during the day, can be “just gone” when I finally relax for the evening.  Then I’m reminded about my head and the whirlwind of “stuff” that is in there, and I kind of understand. This morning while taking a look at my site stats I noticed a post labeled “picking up the pieces” that I had written and remembered one of those thoughts…Yay! no whirlwind in my head today.

Not long ago I was “pondering” about how decisions you make during your life can have a profound effect on your circumstances for years to come, some good and some bad. I’ve realized that when I was younger I made decisions much differently than I do today, probably because I know that even the smallest of decisions can have big implications.  I would bet many of “us older people” would have some words of wisdom for the younger generation.  When you think about choices that you’ve made are there any that you wish you wouldn’t have made?  There are definitely some of those in my life.  Even the good decisions, the ones that I wouldn’t change, the life time decisions, like getting married, buying a home, moving to a different city, or having children; I have at one time or another, thought…WHAT WAS I THINKING? Honestly, not that I would change any of those things if I had to do it all over again, but the “what was I thinking” thought was definitely there at one time or another.

However there is one decision that I have NEVER felt that way about. I’ve thought it through, for many months now, trying to remember a time.  I’ve been thinking back to so many times during my life and I cannot think of one time that I’ve ever had the “what was I thinking” thought about inviting Jesus into my life.  No regrets, not once ever, can I think of a time that I was disappointed or disillusioned with that decision. Jesus never promised that life would be easy and there are many of those “difficult” times, but I wouldn’t want to go through them without Him. The gospel (good news)of Jesus was for everlasting life, not easy life.

With Palm Sunday the beginning of Holy week, commemorating Jesus’ glorious entrance into Jerusalem, then, less than a week later, seeing how quickly the tide turned for Him and the disciples, into something awful that be described as God’s will, I’ve decided to celebrate Jesus’ glorious entrance into my life almost 20 years ago and be thankful that after all those years I’ve never looked back to wonder “what was I thinking?” but instead, I have been more and more humbled by the fact that He loved me enough to die for me.

I want to remember the words of Jesus, “You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you so that you might go and bear fruit—fruit that will last—and so that whatever you ask in my name the Father will give you”. – John 15:16



My prayer for this week is that we all spend a little time thinking about Jesus and the meaning and implications of His last week before being crucified.

God Bless,


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